Nine Things to Frustrate

1. That all it takes is for the weather to get to 13 degrees for London parks to turn into festival grounds, replacing your view of grass with a mass of bodies...and that I was one of them

2. Political journalists who don't give MPs the space to finish a sentence because they think that this sounds more authentic, pushing the boundaries, when actually they are just arguing for arguments sake

3. Disappointing cupcakes - that cost you £4 and taste about as interesting Paris Hilton's views on voting

4. Kids at the age of 8 who ask you to 'suck their d!*k' and want to 'wipe their face in your arse and then c*m in your mouth'. Mainly out of an unhealthy jealousy that I didn't even know what sex was at 8 years old.

5. Forking out an unreasonably large sum of money for a salad, not just a salad, an over-packaged, insanely promoted, expensive M&S salad...and then realising that you didn't get a fork to eat it with. Doh

6. Realising that you are the only person who has said 'doh' since the 90's departed us...

7. When your light switch is so broken it has come away from the wall, and yet the light still magically stays on

8. The fact that I strongly refuse to admit I am British, preferring instead to be Belgian, European, or even at a push, specifically Welsh, and yet I have just spent ten minutes complaining as a form of entertainment.

God save the Queen.

9. The fact that its only 8 o'clock and I'm already so tired that I can't actually put two words together to create a coherent thought let alone a tenth thing that frustrates me...

Maybe I am Belgian afterall